I returned to Chicoutimi and my student life fully revitalized after four weeks of field work in the north. Revitalized in the sense of normalcy within the bleak year of 2020. The harsh lockdowns of the previous months had drained my willpower, but that stretch in the field rekindled something. A sense of momentum. Of purpose.
On a late-summer’s day, somewhere in Chicoutimi
September had arrived and the academic year had begun. The university was slightly more open now. Masks and distancing were still in place, but at least there were people in the halls again. Some recreational spaces reopened too, including the gym I had signed up for. Slowly, it felt like we were climbing out of the lockdown haze.
Back to the grind
With the amount of material Alexandre and I brought back, we had months of work ahead. All those rock samples needed processing. Cutting them down, preparing them for thin sections, and eventually for geochemical analysis.
We both had prior lab experience and felt confident going in. The lab manager walked us through the equipment. A couple of fixed rock saws, a discussion about blades. Alexandre asked David, the lab manager, for the best blades since our samples were granitic, quartz-rich, and extremely hard.
Coming back from the field with rock samples of different sizes
David gave us the “student treatment.” He didn’t trust us with the sharper blades and handed us the smoother ones instead, telling us to just take more time. Not a great start.
After a single day it became obvious those “safe” blades weren’t going to cut it. Literally. We were standing there for hours, barely making progress. Eventually David gave in, and from the next day on we were allowed to use the proper blades.
That solved one problem, but another quickly appeared. Even with the right blades, the machines kept shutting down under strain. David explained the fix involved flipping a breaker switch in an electrical box, but according to protocol, he was supposed to call an electrician to do it.
For us, this was next level. Calling an electrician just to flip a switch? How did anything get done? It was the complete opposite of the fix-it-yourself mentality we grew up with in Europe.
Outlaws in the lab
The work settled into a routine. Daily sessions of rock cutting. Alexandre had far more to process than I did, seventeen buckets compared to my five, so I helped where I could.
The breaker issue quickly became unbearable. It would trip multiple times a day, and David wasn’t always around. Sometimes we’d be stuck waiting hours just to continue working. Then came the day he wasn’t there at all.
The bridge to nowhere across nothing in northern Chicoutimi
Within the first hour, everything shut down again. That was it. Alexandre had had enough. The electrical box wasn’t locked, just braced. He opened it, flipped the switch, and closed it back up. We were back in business. Outlaws at work. And we got a lot done that day. No more waiting. No more interruptions. Just progress.
By late afternoon we were exhausted but satisfied. Then I noticed something that instantly killed the mood. A small ocean had formed in the lab. All the water from the saws hadn’t been draining properly. It was pooling in the center of the room and slowly creeping toward David’s office.
We were screwed.
The Great Flood scandal
The design of the room made no sense. The lowest point was where the water pooled, while the drainage grates sat slightly higher. It was absurd.
So we grabbed the wide navy brooms and started pushing the water uphill toward the drains. It took over an hour. By the end, most of it was gone, but the floor was still wet and muddy. We were completely drained ourselves, so we decided to leave it overnight and come back early to finish.
The slabs I ended up with after cutting the rocks, prior to sending them off for thin sectioning
The next morning was a disaster. David was furious. He wanted to ban us from the lab. Alexandre had already taken the initial hit before I arrived, and Lucie was there trying to mediate. We explained the drainage issue and what had happened, but there was another problem. He had found out about the breaker.
Illegal. Catastrophic. Students flipping a switch. Endangering everyone. You get the idea.
Lucie was more understanding. She had grown up in France and shared our mindset. Later she even told us she once got scolded for changing a light bulb herself instead of calling an electrician. Canada… what the hell?
Yes, it sounds ranty. But that’s exactly how it felt. The whole situation was absurd. We were put in time-out. Not for long though.
Once David ran the saws himself, he quickly realized the drains were clogged. That was the real cause of the flooding. Not us. We were eventually pardoned, with one condition: stay away from the electrical box.
Fair enough. Luckily, thanks to our “outlaw day,” we could afford to slow things down.
Better days
By October we were finally done cutting. The samples were sent off, and the next phase began. This was my favorite part.
Thin sections opened up an entirely new world. What looked simple in hand sample became incredibly complex under the microscope. Beyond quartz, feldspar, and amphibole, there were all these accessory minerals. Titanite, apatite, sulfides, magnetite, zircon and more. Zircon was of particular interest for us. Its resistance to alteration makes it ideal for dating. Tiny crystals carrying time itself. You could get a surprisingly accurate idea of when the host rock formed.
Microscopic image of one of my thin sections in natural light, with a colorful array of amphiboles and biotite in a dirty white sea of feldspar
I was equally interested in apatite and sulfides. Some for thermometry and barometry calculations, others just out of curiosity. This was the kind of research I loved. Digging into complex methods, trying to reconstruct pressure, temperature, even oxygen fugacity of ancient magmatic systems. From that, you could infer things like the potential of a magma to transport gold.
It was precise and logical, yet somehow felt like science fiction.
Remote science in a strange year
Restrictions still made things complicated. For laser ablation work, we used the LA-ICP-MS at Laurentian University in Sudbury. Their setup was more powerful than what we had at UQAC. The lab manager, Jeff, was fantastic. After a short introduction, he trusted me to book and operate the system remotely. It was a pleasure.
Another thin section image, under polarized light this time showcasing the vivid colors quartz and zonation in feldspar
However, not everyone was that flexible. The microprobe lab in Quebec City refused remote access entirely, despite my prior experience from the University of Copenhagen. In doing all of the work themselves, their schedule was very limited and it took a very long time for me to get my results. Everyone was adapting differently to the new world of restrictions.
Still, those final months of 2020 were good for me.
Another thin section, this time under cathodoluminescence, highlighting a bunch of apatite crystals in a fluorescent green
“Laser time” became something I genuinely looked forward to. I would spend entire days in Lucie’s lab, remotely running analyses on my samples in Sudbury. One of my favorite tools was the EDS system. Quick, on-the-spot chemical readings. Not as precise as the laser, but perfect for identifying minerals and satisfying curiosity.
I’ll never forget December 2020. That’s when I identified a rare fluoro-carbonate mineral as parisite. High in rare earth elements. My first and only truly exotic find using EDS. Another memorable moment was spotting thorite inclusions inside zircon grains that looked completely destroyed from within. A perfect example of metamictisation. Radiation slowly breaking down the crystal structure over time.
Magnetite (in the center) and three zircons in preparation for EDS analysis. The top and rightmost zircons retained their zonation, while the bottom-left one has a destroyed core, replaced with bright white inclusions of thorite
These were my small discoveries. Quiet victories in a microscopy lab, with avant-garde progressive metal playing in the background. Some of my best memories from UQAC.
A quiet, uneasy ending
But December also brought a tightening of restrictions again. A new COVID variant, renewed panic, and Quebec shut things down once more. Non-essential services closed. The gym, which had kept me active and sane, was gone again. A curfew was introduced. Christmas gatherings were effectively cancelled.
After nearly a year of this, we had enough. Restrictions or not, Alexandre, Pedro, and I decided to meet for a turkey dinner at Pedro’s place.
Christmas turkey dinner at Pedro’s
I remember how dead the streets were that evening. Even by Chicoutimi standards, it felt eerie. Snow-covered, silent. Curtains drawn everywhere, as if people were hiding how many guests they had inside. It felt like everyone was quietly rebelling, but also watching over their shoulder.
The idea that you had to hide a small gathering from the authorities was… surreal. Still, we had our evening. We caught up. We laughed. For a moment, things felt normal again. 2020 was coming to an end, and we allowed ourselves a bit of hope.
Surely 2021 would be better. How much worse could it get?
After a rocky first week of geology field work in Chibougamau, pun intended, our fortunes were about to improve. You could say we’d hit rock bottom… Okay, I’m pushing it now with the dad jokes. Just to recap some of our mishaps: we lost one of our GPS devices somewhere in the forest, we lost one of the truck’s side mirrors, and we got it stuck in deep mud, requiring the other team to come pull it out. At least we were being productive and getting some rock samples. Well, at least Alexandre was. I couldn’t reach one of my primary targets due to the thick forest and overgrown roads.
But field work has a funny way of balancing things out. Just when it feels like the forest is determined to humble you, something finally goes right.
Heavy Duty Sampling
As we got more accustomed to the terrain and our new sampling routine, we were becoming increasingly efficient with our time. Regular geological field sampling usually involves finding a good representative outcrop and hammering off a few fresh pieces of rock from it.
Sampling rocks using various tools
In the Canadian Shield, however, the outcrops are most often flattened, rounded, and polished by ancient glacial activity. That makes it highly difficult to hammer any decent rock pieces out of them. Even when using a chisel, we would usually end up with thin, superficial weathered chips that would yield poor geochemical results. Hardly representative of the magmas that had crystallized billions of years ago.
In Canada, however, we had an alternative method of sampling, something I had never seen, nor needed to use during field work in Europe: a rock saw. Or a concrete saw, as some call it. Essentially a hand-held motorized saw fitted with a large diamond cutting blade. A chainsaw for outcrops, if you will.
The rock saw and water pump backpack tank we used
This thing… was impressive. It was big, heavy, loud, and an absolute pain on the lower back to use. But boy, could it sample. Instead of hammering on a flat outcrop for half an hour only to collect a few useless weathered fragments, we could cut thick slabs of fresh, unaltered rock straight from the interior of the outcrop. As an added bonus, the vibration and exhaust during cutting kept most of the bugs away. Suffice to say, it quickly became our preferred method of sampling.
The rock saw did have two major downsides. It required a nearby water source to fill the cooling pump tank, and it was quite cumbersome to carry on longer hikes deep into the dense forest. However, for the easier-to-reach outcrops, it was a no-brainer. It saved us an incredible amount of time.
The Needle in a Haystack
One day, after becoming quite efficient with our rock saw, we managed to finish the day’s sampling targets surprisingly early. With plenty of spare time on our hands, Alexandre and I decided to head back to the forest where our GPS had gone missing during the first week. Maybe, just maybe, we could find it somewhere near the road.
Cattails swaying where the boreal meets the bog
We only had an approximate idea of the location since there were no GPS tracks to follow back. Alexandre parked the truck in roughly the same area where we thought we had stopped before. We headed into the forest and began searching. Pretty quickly, though, it became clear that this was a hopeless task.
The forest all looked the same. Thick bushes and tangled underbrush everywhere. The ground covered in a soft carpet of leaves, moss, and rotting branches. We wandered around for five or ten minutes before Alexandre finally gave up. It was the very definition of a needle-in-a-haystack situation. Defeated, we slowly wandered back toward the truck, still half-heartedly scanning the ground as we walked.
As I neared the road and slowly put one foot in front of the other, something caught my eye.
A faint flash of bright orange beneath the leaves, right where I was about to step.
THE GPS.
Against all odds, almost as if guided there by sheer luck, my foot nearly landed right on top of it. My eyes lit up. My jaw dropped. I bent down, grabbed it, and with a triumphant battle cry echoing through the forest, raised it high above my head like a long-lost trophy. We couldn’t believe it.
Fireweed in the endless green
It was a moment of pure disbelief, followed by sheer amazement and slightly manic laughter. It felt like a sign. Fortune had clearly turned in our favor.
“Pluton de France” the Second Attempt
After that stroke of luck, I decided to take another shot at Pluton de France on my project’s next field day. Since we had failed to reach the outlined polygon on my map by car the previous time, I wanted to attempt it on foot instead. This was going to be a bold undertaking, as the bush in this particular part of the Abitibi looked extremely dense.
Alexandre wasn’t too keen on the idea of a long, arduous hike through the boreal jungle. Fortunately, Adrian happened to be free that day and was willing to join me. So for one day I swapped partners and headed back northeast toward the elusive intrusive rocks somewhere near the edge of the Abitibi Greenstone Belt.
We drove as far as we could, essentially until we reached one of the old roads that had once led toward my target area. The road, however, had long since been reclaimed by nature. It was completely overgrown by dense alder thickets.
Right this way, sir… your target awaits just a couple of kilometers ahead. Enjoy your refreshing swim through the green foliage. Don’t forget your goggles… and a prayer
These alders seemed to thrive anywhere the forest had once been disturbed. Where logging had opened the canopy, they quickly took over the landscape. They grew like a strange hybrid between bushes and small trees—clusters of multiple thin trunks sprouting from a single base in the ground. Their branches were flexible, tightly packed, and tangled together into nearly impenetrable walls of vegetation.
Ironically, pushing through these alder thickets was often far more difficult than walking through the untouched forest. At least beneath the mature spruce and pine trees there was space to move. In the alder patches, however, every step became a battle against springy branches and dense foliage that refused to let you pass.
Swimming in Trees
We powered through as best we could, large tool-filled backpacks and all. This was easily the worst forest trekking of the entire field trip. We were legitimately fighting the forest inch by inch. Roots constantly tripped us up, while dense branches grabbed at our clothes and gear. This was the moment when I coined the phrase “swimming in trees.” The large sledgehammer sticking out of my backpack kept snagging on branches every few steps, which certainly didn’t help.
At least the trees provided shade from the mid-August sun
Still… we pushed on. Slowly. Extremely slowly. Fighting for every meter through an endless wall of dense bush. After a couple of hours of this, we finally reached the Pluton de France polygon according to the geological map.
And of course, there wasn’t an outcrop in sight. However, further ahead we noticed what looked like a small rise in the terrain. A hill meant there was a chance that bedrock might be exposed beneath the soil. So we pushed on. Eventually we reached a small incline and decided to start digging. We removed thick layers of leaves, branches, and soil until we struck rock. Finally!
The problem was that it looked… strange. Dark, heavily weathered, and altered by the soil to the point that I couldn’t immediately identify it. So we kept digging, clearing away more of the surface. When we finally managed to hammer off a few pieces, the truth became obvious.
A proud Adrien after we found and unearthed that first outcrop
It wasn’t what I was looking for at all. Not even close to what the map had suggested.
Pluton de Lies
Blasted inaccurate map, I thought. Still, we were close to the edge of the polygon, so I took a sample anyway and suggested we push a little farther toward the nearby lake that covered much of the mapped area.
Somewhere around that time another thought crossed my mind: this would be an absolutely terrible place to have a wildlife encounter. If we ran into a bear here, there would be no easy way to escape the sea of trees surrounding us. Then again, perhaps a bear would be smart enough to avoid pushing through such thick forest. Unlike us.
Some time later, deeper inside the target area, we finally found a small clearing near the top of the hill. To my relief there were even a couple of outcrops exposed there. Of course, they were perfectly flat and glacially polished—impossible to sample properly without the rock saw.
Hammering rock, only to find disappointment
And worse still… It was once again the wrong rock type. Dark, heavily altered basalt everywhere instead of the light-colored granitoids I had been hoping to find. What a disappointment.
More than anything, I was frustrated with the map itself. These geological maps, after all, are produced by the Québec Ministry during annual field campaigns. But even those teams can only cover so much ground, and sometimes the boundaries of geological units end up being… educated guesses. I marked the location on the map to note the discrepancy and kept the token sample from the previous location as reference.
Lucie later appreciated the effort, but she still had me discard the sample since it wasn’t useful for the project. All that effort. All that struggle through the forest. For nothing. But that’s field work. You win some. You lose some.
Roaming the Chibougamau Region
We continued our sampling campaign well into August. Alexandre’s project took us all around the Chibougamau area—from the high cliffs northeast of the lake to the far western stretches near Oujé-Bougoumou.
And once more we were close to a temporarily restricted area
On the western side of the Chibougamau pluton, we stumbled across several piles of trash near Oujé-Bougoumou. A sad and unfortunate eyesore in an otherwise vast and pristine wilderness. We also came across numerous animal tracks, mostly large canine ones. Likely local dogs, though wolves were certainly not out of the question.
Maybe someone should invest in a trash bin, or ten…
The only wildlife we consistently encountered, however, were the grouse, or as I liked to call them, forest chickens. We had heard plenty of stories about them beforehand, usually involving their questionable survival instincts. Instead of fleeing from danger, these birds, especially protective mothers, would often charge directly at the perceived threat in a rather unconvincing display of bravery. Not the best strategy when facing modern human inventions like trucks.
A mother grouse coming out onto the road to escort us away from her chicks
On foot, however, they were simply amusing. They would follow us around at a cautious distance, clucking and posturing, as if politely insisting that we leave their territory.
In the northeast, on the other hand, we encountered more “exciting” forest roads for our battle-hardened truck. At one point, a deep natural ditch carved out by a small creek abruptly killed the engine as the truck dropped into it—perfectly synchronized with the beat drop of the music playing in the car. No lasting damage, but plenty of dramatic effect.
The southern Wetlands
Whenever we shifted focus back to my project, we found ourselves driving farther and farther away from Chibougamau.
Only the best road conditions for us
One day took us deep south toward a small intrusion known as the Hazeur pluton. The landscape there transitioned from dense forest to open wetlands. At one point, the water had quite literally claimed part of the road. Alexandre, understandably, was having flashbacks to our previous encounter with waterlogged terrain that had left us completely stuck. This time, however, there was no mud, just firm gravel beneath the shallow water. We proceeded cautiously and made it through without issue.
The small Hazer pluton location. Still in doubt whether outcrop or boulder.
At the end of the road, a small outcrop, or possibly just a very large boulder, awaited us. The quiet swamp surrounded us on all sides. Far removed from any main road, it felt like prime territory for wildlife encounters. We spotted a few birds, including a large and majestic sandhill crane. In the distance, the eerie calls of loons echoed across the wetlands, occasionally interrupted by the faint howling of wolves.
A true call of the wild.
Zoomed in shot of a Sandhill Crane striding through tall grass in the Canadian wilderness
Despite that, there was no real sense of danger. We were working right next to the truck, heavy tools within reach. If anything, I felt completely at peace. There were barely any bugs, the scenery was wide open and beautiful, and for a moment it felt like we had stepped into a nature documentary.
Lesser Yellowlegs foraging stealthily in a marshy reed bed, blending perfectly with the surrounding cattails and reflections
To top it all off, I managed to collect several excellent sample blocks for my study. Easily one of the best locations we visited during the trip.
Blood for Samples
Another day took us west, past Chapais, toward a small syenite intrusion known as the Dolodau Stock. There, I finally managed to collect some of the best samples for my project. But the bounty came at a cost. Blood. We had wandered deep into black fly territory, and they were out in the millions. We were the main course.
Coming across blueberry bushes everywhere we went
Between hammering rocks and repeatedly drenching ourselves in bug spray, we uncovered one of the most fascinating outcrops of the entire campaign: a carbonatite unit, quite a rare igneous rock type, crosscut by sulfur-rich syenite veins.
Shiny disseminated pyrite cubes sparkled within the syenite. Grey magnetite blobs and black flaky micas stood out against the white carbonatite. Thick, blocky calcite veins cut across the outcrop like frozen rivers of stone. It was a geological treasure trove.
The large carbonatite unit, riddled with phlogopite (black mica) and magnetite
Throughout our field days, we often stumbled upon vast patches of wild blueberry bushes. Whenever we finished early, we would start gathering and snacking. Before long, we had collected an impressive haul, which we eventually brought back to base to dry and preserve.
The Final Days
The August days slipped by quickly, and our field campaign began drawing to a close. A few moments from that final week still stand out.
Prepping for a stroll along the northern railway
One of them involved walking along a set of railway tracks to reach a cliffside outcrop. It was a surprisingly calm day. No bushwhacking, no brutal driving, just a relaxed walk and straightforward sampling.
On another day, possibly our last, we aimed to reach one final target within the Chibougamau pluton. It was an easily accessible outcrop near a side road running parallel to the main road. However, the only connecting route required a long detour. Naturally, we decided to make things more interesting.
Killdeer standing alert and photogenic in short grass
After finishing our work, and soaking our boots while crossing flooded ground, I suggested taking a shortcut based on the map. Alexandre hesitated, but eventually gave in. I think we were both feeling a bit nostalgic about pushing our luck one last time. A sharp turn later, we found ourselves driving through a wet, sandy stretch just before a ramp leading up to the main road.
And… the truck got stuck. Again. This time, however, we were ready.
I jumped out to assess the situation while Alexandre quickly wedged traction aids under the tires. On my signal, he floored it, and the truck launched itself free, gliding across the remaining sand with ease. We had clearly graduated from the school of getting stuck in the mud.
The vast empty straight roads of the north
A Thunderous Roar Downstairs
Back at base, we needed to dry our soaked boots for the next day. There was a designated drying room, but it wasn’t quite enough for boots that wet. So naturally, we came up with a brilliant idea:
We put them in the dryer. The sound was… apocalyptic.
Meanwhile our blueberry bounty was drying in the kitchen upstairs
The machine roared and thundered as it violently tossed the heavy boots around inside, like drums announcing the end of the world. We closed every door we could, but the noise still echoed through the building like a distant storm. Miraculously, the dryer survived. And so did our boots.
The End of a Successful Field Campaign
On one of the final evenings, the sky was perfectly clear. No moon, no clouds. I suggested we drive out of town and stop at one of the abandoned quarries for some stargazing. After some hesitation, Nesrine and Adrian agreed. It was well worth it.
Above us stretched a breathtaking night sky. The Milky Way cut across the darkness, its bright star clusters contrasted by the deep shadow of the dark rift. As we stood there in silence, we once again heard wolves howling in the distance. It felt like the perfect ending to our time in the wilderness.
Under a crystal in northern Canadian wilderness
After 28 days of field work, we had collected 24 buckets of rock samples. Despite the rough start, we had successfully completed our summer campaign during one of the strangest years in recent history, 2020. A year when the world seemed to shut down. When uncertainty, isolation, and restrictions became part of everyday life.
And yet, out there in the wilds of northern Canada, things felt… different. For a while, we were free.
Free to work. Free to explore. Free to live something that felt almost normal again.
It wasn’t always easy. There were frustrations, setbacks, and long exhausting days. But there was also laughter, discovery, and moments that stayed with us. Moments that Alexandre and I still find ourselves retelling years later. And just like that, it was time to head back to Chicoutimi.
Messy beards, messy hairs and a truckload of samples after an adventurous month in the field
Back to our strangely constrained lives as PhD students in a world that hadn’t quite opened up again.
August, 2020. After months of solitude during the first COVID lockdown, our research team was finally somewhat liberated and on the move again. Our supervisor, Lucie, had secured us a three-week fieldwork campaign in northern Quebec. Two trucks. Two teams of two. Adrien and Nesrine, our group’s Master’s students. Alexandre and I, the PhD students. We set off north from Chicoutimi toward Chibougamau, the road stretching deeper and deeper into the boreal wilderness.
A Proper North American Truck
Even though I had recently obtained my Quebec driver’s license, I was still chickening out of driving. I was more than happy to let Alexandre take the wheel, especially since he seemed to prefer it anyway. Win-win.
The university had provided us with a pair of Ford F-150s. It was the largest truck either of us had been in, let alone driven thus far. Its size and power was clearly impressive. Sitting high above the road gave a commanding view, with very spacious and comfortable seating and engines that had more than enough muscle for the long northern highways. However, for the kind of forest roads and tight access tracks we would soon be navigating, the sheer size of the trucks would prove highly inconvenient.
The long drive north passed easily enough. Alexandre and I filled the hours with endless conversations, comparing cars, sharing relief about finally escaping our pandemic-induced confinement, and making plans for the weeks ahead.
A thick calcite vein cutting across an outcrop at Dolodau
We also had an unusual passenger with us. Alexandre had decided to bring along his cat, Turalyon. Leaving him alone in Chicoutimi for four weeks didn’t feel right, so Alexandre arranged for the cat to stay at a small animal shelter in Chibougamau while we were working in the field. Every few days, after returning from long days of sampling and driving through the wilderness, we would stop by to visit him.
Turalyon was not particularly fond of long car rides. Alexandre had to pull over a few times to clean up some cat puke along the way. Just another fun little bonus activity during our drive north.
Music also became a major part of the journey. Both of us were enthusiastic listeners with overlapping tastes, so the truck stereo quickly turned into a rotating playlist of band recommendations and rediscoveries.
The kilometres rolled by as the forests thickened and the towns grew fewer.
A Mining Town in the Boreal North
Chibougamau is the largest town in northern Quebec’s administrative region—an immense, sparsely populated territory that covers much of the province’s interior. Surrounded by endless boreal forest and lakes, the town sits within the traditional lands of the Cree Nation.
The region first drew attention during the 19th century when prospectors began exploring its mineral potential. But it wasn’t until the mid-20th century that Chibougamau truly emerged as a mining center, after significant copper and gold deposits were discovered in the surrounding area.
Watch out for that first step… it’s a doozey
Today the town remains an important hub for exploration and mining operations across northern Quebec. Geological surveys, drilling campaigns, and mineral development projects continue to bring researchers, geologists, and industry workers through the region. Companies such as SOQUEM maintain a strong presence, supporting exploration efforts across the vast northern landscape.
For a group of geology students heading into the field, it was very much the right place to be.
Barracks Living
Once in Chibougamau, we settled into our temporary accommodation at a SOQUEM work barracks on the edge of town.
As long as I got my Salmon Jerky with me, I’m good to go
It was certainly no Hotel Manoir D’Auteuil—a luxurious stay we had enjoyed during a conference trip the year before—but it provided everything we needed to get through the campaign. Well… almost everything.
The tap water, for instance. It smelled… swampy. And it tasted just as questionable. As we soon learned, the facility wasn’t connected to the city’s main water system. The barracks relied on its own untreated water source, which explained the unusual flavour.
Alexandre and I quickly made the executive decision to stick to bottled water. Adrien, on the other hand, decided to wing it. His stomach protested the decision rather violently. After several days of intense bathroom visits, a valuable fieldwork lesson had been learned.
Organizing Ourselves
Lucie would only be joining us during the second week of the campaign. Until then, we were largely responsible for organizing and coordinating the work ourselves. Without a clearly defined leadership structure, the early days required a bit of improvisation. Lucie had informally suggested that Adrien take on a coordinating role, mainly because he had already spent a year working in Quebec and was somewhat familiar with local field protocols. However, it wasn’t presented as a strict hierarchy, but more of a practical suggestion.
Our improvised office in Chibougamau
In practice, this meant that everyone approached the work with slightly different ideas about how things should run. Adrien tended to lean toward established field routines and procedures. For example, he suggested that we follow a schedule similar to one he had used during a previous placement with the Ministry, where Sundays were reserved as rest days. Alexandre and I looked at the situation a bit differently.
Our campaign was limited to just four weeks, and we had a substantial amount of work to complete. From our perspective, it made more sense to remain flexible and take advantage of good weather windows whenever possible. Rather than fixing a weekly day off, we preferred to let the weather dictate our rest days. As it turned out, that approach worked out quite well.
We ended up working straight through several Sundays when the weather was ideal. Later, when a particularly miserable stretch of rain rolled through during the week, we simply stayed back at the barracks and took that opportunity to rest while the others pushed through damp conditions with limited progress.
Time Versus Caution
Another topic that sparked some discussion was the question of daily working hours. Adrien suggested we follow a strict afternoon cut-off time. No matter what we were doing in the field, we should be heading back toward the barracks by around 4 p.m.
Gilman lake on the east side of Chibougamau
Alexandre and I once again leaned toward a more flexible approach. In August, daylight in northern Quebec stretches well into the evening, and it felt almost wasteful to leave productive field sites while the sun was still high in the sky. Our instinct was to maximize our time outdoors whenever conditions allowed.
At the same time, Adrien’s caution wasn’t without merit. Fieldwork in remote terrain carries its own set of risks. If something were to go wrong—vehicle trouble on a forest road (foreshadowing), an injury on an outcrop, or getting temporarily stuck somewhere off the grid—it might require assistance from the other team. Pushing too far into the evening could mean that any unexpected situation would have to be dealt with as daylight faded, increasing the complexity and risk of resolving the problem.
In other words, what Alexandre and I saw as maximizing productivity, Adrien viewed through the lens of field safety and contingency planning.
Neither approach was inherently right or wrong. It was simply a reflection of different working styles. Alexandre and I tended to focus heavily on efficiency and optimization, while Adrien leaned more toward structured procedures and established routines. Like many field teams thrown together for the first time, we were still figuring out our rhythm.
Two Projects, Two Field Strategies
Because Alexandre had more intensive fieldwork to do in the immediate area, we decided to divide our schedule somewhat strategically. Weekdays would be dedicated to his work, while weekends would be used for my own sampling campaign.
Alexandre’s PhD research focused on the Chibougamau pluton, a massive granodiorite intrusive rock body underlying much of the region around the town. Formed roughly 2.7 billion years ago during the late Archean, the pluton represents an ancient magmatic system associated with significant gold mineralization in the region. His work aimed to conduct a detailed petrogenetic study of these rocks—essentially reconstructing how the magma formed, evolved, and ultimately crystallized deep within the Earth’s crust.
The kind of pinkish rocks we were looking for during our field trip
My own project took a somewhat broader approach. Instead of focusing on a single intrusion, I was sampling a number of different late-Archean syenite intrusions scattered across the region, which Lucie and I had preselected before the campaign. These locations were much farther from Chibougamau and often required long drives from our base.
In simple terms, both of us were chasing light pinkish rocks formed from very ancient magmas—just slightly different kinds, and in different places. Alexandre was studying the internal story of one major intrusion. I was comparing several others in order to test the validity of a somewhat debated geological model known as intrusion-related gold systems. Different scientific questions, but somewhat overlapping regions of work.
Day One in the Ghost House
The first day began under a murky sky with light rain in the forecast. We drove northeast out of Chibougamau, gradually leaving pavement behind as we followed increasingly questionable forest roads winding through lakes and dense boreal forest. Somewhere beneath us lay the Chibougamau pluton itself. The intrusion stretches across dozens of kilometres beneath the region, extending beneath the large lake in the area.
So far so good. The road’s looking pretty chill… except for maybe that last bit
The roads we were using had once been logging or mining access routes. Many had clearly not seen much maintenance in years. Some looked like they had not seen any maintenance at all. This particular road was a pretty good contender for the worst we’d encounter.
Branches increasingly scraped along both sides of the truck as we pushed forward through narrow overgrowth. Every few minutes I would optimistically reassure Alexandre: Look, it’s getting better. Almost immediately another set of branches would slap aggressively against the doors and mirrors.
This was also where the size of the F-150 started to work against us. These trucks are perfect for the big wide, preferably paved, northern roads. But not for these tight abandoned roads that were slowly being reclaimed by the forest. Now, some people might have suggested parking the truck and continuing on foot. But the distances Alexandre needed to cover for his sampling were enormous. With limited time and an efficiency-focused mindset, we decided to push forward with the vehicle and see how far we could get.
Deeper and deeper we went searching for rocks
At some point early in the trip, while driving along one of the forest roads, I noticed a strange button on the truck’s key fob marked with a little exclamation point. I had never seen anything like it before, so I jokingly asked Alexandre if it was the panic button. Curious himself, he pressed it—and the truck immediately erupted into a series of loud honks that echoed through the quiet forest, catching both of us completely off guard. So yes… it was indeed the panic button. From that moment on, that’s exactly what we called it.
Later that same day, after wandering through the misty woods in search of rock outcrops, we eventually decided to head back toward the road. The problem was that we weren’t entirely sure where the road actually was anymore. We thought we had a decent sense of direction, but just to confirm, Alexandre pressed the panic button again so we could listen for the truck. The honking came from the complete opposite direction—not slightly off, but entirely wrong. And this wasn’t even in the dense jungle-like forest we would encounter later in the trip. It was a humbling reminder of just how easy it was to lose your bearings out here without proper navigation equipment.
The First Day’s Results
And cover ground we did. By the end of the day we had pushed as far along that road as we reasonably could without wasting too much time wandering blindly through the forest on foot. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much reward waiting at the end of the drive.
Outcrops were scarce. Most of what surrounded us was dense forest, marshland, and the occasional lake. Not exactly a rocky paradise for an ambitious geologist on his first field day. Still, we had managed to survey a large area, collect a few samples, and, most importantly, get a better sense of the terrain.
Were we even on the road anymore? Who knew?
The mood remained high throughout the day. Music played through the truck speakers while we joked constantly about the excellent road conditions and weather. But on the way back, our spirits took a sudden hit.
Remember those branches scraping along the truck? Well… some of them were larger than others. Quite a bit larger. In several places the vehicle had essentially been squeezed through narrow sections of overgrown road. Forced through might actually be a more accurate description. Somewhere along that journey, without either of us noticing, the passenger’s side mirror decided to take a hike. Not the entire mirror assembly. Just the glass. Gone. Vanished into the northern wilderness.
Driving back to base with morale in the toilet
We hadn’t thought to fold the mirrors while navigating what increasingly felt like a boreal jungle. Another lesson learned. Alexandre immediately slammed the truck into a U-turn and we began carefully retracing our path in the hope of recovering the missing mirror. Despite a thorough search and a considerable amount of backtracking, we never found it.
Not Exactly According to Plan
The unexpected mirror recovery operation also meant we pushed our return much later into the afternoon than originally planned. By the time we rolled back into the barracks, it was well past the time Adrien had suggested we should be safely heading back from the field. The situation did not exactly improve the ongoing debate about field schedules and safety margins.
Another tense discussion followed between Adrien and a very frustrated Alexandre, fueled by our late return, the damaged vehicle, and the already diverging approaches to how we thought the field campaign should run.
For the moment, Alexandre and I quietly decided to keep one particular detail to ourselves. Namely, that the truck was now missing a mirror. We were off to a spectacular start.
The Terror of the North
A couple of days later the skies finally cleared and we were rewarded with several bright, sunny days. With the warmth and sunshine, however, came one of the true terrors of northern fieldwork: the insects.
The weather had improved, but would our fortune improve as well?
The boreal forest is infamous for its seasonal waves of bloodsucking pests. Four main culprits dominate the warm months, each appearing at slightly different times of the summer, sometimes overlapping in particularly miserable combinations. The most famous worldwide is the mosquito. Ironically, these were often the least annoying of the group at least during the daytime.
Then came the true terror of the north: black flies. These tiny specks looked almost like fruit flies, but they were relentless carnivores. And where there was one, there were usually thousands. They crawled into every opening they could find—ears, sleeves, collars—biting and harassing you constantly. Walking through the forest meant being surrounded by a cloud of them, endlessly probing for exposed skin. They were absolute hellspawns.
A fuzzy bug on an outcrop
The other two members of the northern insect quartet are deerflies and horseflies, but thankfully we encountered relatively few of those during this particular adventure. The black flies, however, were more than enough.
The Jungle of the North
Some days were worse than others, and some locations were far more tolerable. Around town or along major roads things were manageable. But the moment we stepped deep into the forest, or near lakes and swampy areas, the insects quickly reminded us who really owned the place. But for us newcomers, it was pretty brutal.
The forest itself didn’t help matters either. In many places the vegetation was so dense that moving through it became a full-body workout. Progress meant constantly pushing through branches, tangled bushes, and young trees fighting for sunlight. Coming from Europe, it felt almost surreal.
A white-spotted sawyer beetle in the back of our truck
This wasn’t the kind of forest I had grown up with. Not even close. It was more like an overgrown jungle. Without a machete, you were essentially swimming through vegetation, pushing your way forward against an endless green current.
More Bad Luck
On one of the weekdays during our first week, we were traversing a section of what I would generously describe as medium-density forest. That meant it was still somewhat walkable. We carried our usual gear: hammers, sample bags, notebooks. Alexandre had his tablet, and I carried his Garmin GPS unit clipped to my belt.
Roaming through the boreal forest
After finishing our work in the area, we returned to the truck. That’s when I noticed something odd. The only thing still clipped to my pants was the carabiner and the battery clip. The GPS itself was gone. When I had changed the batteries earlier, I had apparently failed to properly lock the safety latch back into place. Somewhere during our trek through the dense vegetation, the bushes must have caught the device and ripped it clean off.
I felt terrible about losing it. Alexandre, meanwhile, was already becoming increasingly demoralized after the string of mishaps we had experienced so far. To make matters worse, the device design itself seemed almost engineered for failure. The small clip used to attach the GPS to your belt was mounted on the battery compartment, not on the main body of the unit. Meaning if the clip came loose, the entire device simply vanished.
We had to stay close in the forest because even with high visibility vests, we could easily lose each other in the green
Improve your device design, Garmin!
The Quest for the “Pluton de France”
During the first weekend we dedicated Saturday to my project. My target was a large pink blob on the geological map labeled Pluton de France, a sizeable Monzonite intrusion located northeast of Chibougamau. From literature it seemed close enough to what I was hoping to sample for my study.
We tried several old logging roads, driving long stretches only to eventually encounter dead ends. Some roads had collapsed entirely. Others had been completely reclaimed by vegetation. It quickly became clear that any industrial activity in this area had likely been abandoned for many years.
An overgrown old logging site providing a large clearing in the forest
Rather than return empty-handed, I decided to improvise and sample several interesting-looking outcrops along the way. Fieldwork often requires adapting to reality on the ground. After all, there’s only so much you can determine from a rock in hand before laboratory analysis reveals the full story.
At one point we reached a large open clearing left behind by past logging operations. The place felt strangely peaceful. Calm. Quiet. Even the bugs seemed to take a break there. But then we spotted something on the ground. Bear droppings. Suddenly the calm silence of the clearing felt a little less comforting.
A Couple of Hours to Kill
After trying, and failing, to reach the Pluton de France from several different directions, I eventually admitted defeat. We still had some time left in the day, though, and curiosity got the better of me. Just north of our location on the map was a massive lake with a peculiar shape, almost like a giant claw mark carved into the landscape: Lake Mistassini.
Leaving the logging roads behind for the day
From the map it didn’t seem that far away. At least not when zoomed out. We were already roughly halfway between Chibougamau and Mistassini, so why not take the opportunity for a bit of sightseeing? There was just one complication.
Despite the illusion of normality our fieldwork provided, the world was still very much living through the 2020 pandemic lockdowns. We had been clearly instructed that the nearby First Nations communities, including Mistissini and Oujé-Bougoumou, were off limits to outside visitors. And yet here we were. Driving toward Mistassini. Rebels.
A Forbidden Detour
We justified it to ourselves with a simple plan: drive to the lake, take a few photos, refuel, and head back. No interactions with locals. Besides, we were already running low on fuel. The Mistassini gas station was now closer than the one back in Chibougamau. Unfortunately, when we reached the turnoff toward town, we discovered a line of cars waiting at a checkpoint.
The community had set up actual road controls to monitor who was entering and leaving. This is when we started sweating. Turning around was not an option anymore, but Alexandre wasn’t interested in pushing our luck any further either. We would do exactly one thing: reach the gas station, fill up, and leave.
Sunsets from our base camp in Chibougamau
No sightseeing, no lake, No detours. I wasn’t going to push the issue. Alexandre had already had a stressful enough week. And so Lake Mistassini remained unseen. Another small opportunity lost to the rigid world of 2020.
The Beaver Dam
The following day we returned to exploring the Chibougamau area for Alexandre’s project. Another sunny day. Another road our truck was probably never meant to drive on.
You see an impenetrable forest, I see a shortcut
Despite appearances, the road actually wasn’t too bad overall. The only questionable part was a small creek crossing in a swampy section. Otherwise, it was quite decent by our new standards. We collected some solid samples, the insects were tolerable, and the day progressed smoothly. But on the drive back something had changed.
The small creek crossing had widened. Part of the road had begun collapsing into the swamp. Still, we had crossed it once already without issue. Surely the second time would be fine. Alexandre eased the truck slowly forward into the muddy water. And then… The truck stopped. Stuck.
Getting the traction aid out
We stepped out to inspect the situation and quickly realized the problem. The road had been built over an old beaver dam, and that dam had begun collapsing. The more Alexandre tried to drive out, the deeper the front wheel dug itself into the mud. Water seeped into the growing crater around the tire while the truck slowly tilted sideways like a sinking ship. Eventually the car felt so tilted that I had to pull myself out through the drivers side whenever I wanted to get out.
We tried digging. We tried traction aid under the tires. Nothing worked. After more than an hour of struggling, we finally admitted defeat.
The Accidental Distress Signal
Alexandre pulled out the satellite phone and managed to reach Adrien after several attempts. Meanwhile, I grabbed the SPOT emergency GPS device we had been given for field safety. In case of trouble, we were supposed to send a notification through it so our supervisor Lucie, back in Chicoutimi, would know our situation.
There was just one small problem. During the original briefing, it hadn’t been made entirely clear which button should be used in which situation. The device had three buttons. One was strictly for life-threatening emergencies and would contact national rescue services. The other two were meant for lesser degrees of trouble.
Traction aid was doing a great job at sinking into the mud under the tire
Out of the two, I picked the one that sent a distress alert to Lucie and the entire research team back at the university. This naturally caused a brief panic on their end. Some people began discussing whether national rescue services might need to be contacted. Fortunately, Lucie knew us well enough not to immediately escalate the situation.
So no helicopters were dispatched to rescue two geologists with a truck stuck in the mud.
The Rescue Operation
Adrien and Nesrine were already on their way back to the barracks when Alexandre reached them by phone. They immediately turned around and headed toward our location. Meanwhile, we packed our essentials, locked the truck, and began walking down the road toward the main route.
Thankfully, we hadn’t gotten stuck too far from a larger road, so reaching us wasn’t too difficult. After the week Alexandre had endured, he was clearly bracing himself for another argument about field decisions. But none came. Adrien simply picked us up and tried to lighten the mood. No judgment. These things happen. He was a trooper.
Adrien arrived with the second truck
He had also brought along a tow cable. None of us had ever actually attempted a recovery like this before, so a fair amount of improvisation followed. We hooked the two trucks together, stepped back to a safe distance, and Adrien floored it. His truck fishtailed wildly for a moment… Then suddenly our vehicle broke free from the mud with a loud, satisfying suction pop. Cheers erupted.
The crisis was over. And when we returned to base later that evening, we suddenly realized something unfortunate. Oh. Look at that. The passenger-side mirror was missing. What a shame. Clearly it must have fallen off while the truck was stuck in the mud and not at any other point in time… Those damn beavers and their dams.
A Turning Point
For all the misfortunes that plagued our first week—lost mirrors, missing GPS units, insect swarms, collapsing beaver dams—it would ultimately mark the lowest point of the entire campaign. From that moment on, things slowly began to improve.
What a great road… 10 out of 10, would drive it again
The remaining weeks of our fieldwork would prove far smoother, far more productive, and far less chaotic. But those first few days in the northern wilderness had already given us stories we would be laughing about for years.
And the rest of the expedition still had plenty in store for us.
Following Christmas week in New York City, 2019 quietly came to an end with a relaxed New Year’s Eve dinner and drinks between two good friends. I was deep in my experimental cooking phase and had Alexandre over for a homemade, slightly burned, Greek moussaka.
A new year awaited. After the kind of year I’d just had, it was clear 2020 would probably be calmer. A step back. A year to build, not explode forward. As everyone now knows in hindsight, it would be far more than that — for all of us.
The New Semester Brought a New Victim to UQAC
With January came a new semester at UQAC. Alexandre and I registered for the two required PhD courses. Geology was always a small circle with barely a handful of students, most of them foreign. Among them was Pedro, a Brazilian PhD candidate who had just moved to Chicoutimi.
Welcome to the North. This is what you’ll see for half a year.
Pedro was one of those people who collects stories simply by existing. A guy who had never seen snow in his life moved to northern Canada in January, during a -40°C cold snap, with meters of snow and winter storms rolling in like clockwork. The story practically wrote itself.
After surviving the thermal shock, he endured months living with a questionable Québécois family. Among the gems he would retell: the time he opened the basement fridge to find his sandwich placed beside a box containing a dead cat. The owners were “waiting for spring to bury it” and didn’t want to leave it outside.
Pedro processed this information the way any rational person would — by moving out as soon as possible. With the amount of crazy stories he told us about his first months in Canada, he should honestly write his own blog.
The Rivière du Moulin during winter
He fit perfectly into our little circle of mildly disgruntled foreign PhD students trying to decode Quebec one snowstorm at a time.
The Quest for a Drivers License
For me, that winter felt like a tense calm before a summer storm. It was the first year of my PhD. That summer I was scheduled to do three months of fieldwork across Quebec and Ontario. Which meant one thing: I needed to renew my driver’s license.
The path ahead — Park du Rivière-du-Moulin
At the time I possesses an expired Romanian relic I hadn’t used since one lonely drive in Iceland in 2016. Naturally, it couldn’t be simple. Because my foreign license had expired, Quebec couldn’t simply exchange it. I had to redo the tests. Easy enough. Except I had barely driven in ten years.
Confidence low. Stress high. Instead of responsibly studying the driving manual, I decided to go in blindly. In contrast to my first driving exam when I passed both theory and practice on the first try, this time around I failed. Then failed again. The upside? Exam fees were cheap. Unlimited attempts.
The downside? A mandatory one-month wait between attempts. And of course, the regional SAAQ office was in Jonquière, not Chicoutimi. Which meant an hour-long bus ride each way through Saguenay’s bleak winter landscape every time I wanted to fail another exam. It was not a joyous era.
But with each attempt, I improved. Eventually I passed the theoretical. Then came the practical — rinse, repeat, stress, repeat. By summer, I finally had my Quebec driver’s license. Considering what was unfolding globally, this minor bureaucratic victory now feels oddly monumental.
My routine 10 km park walks to and from the supermarket and gym
But I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s rewind to winter.
Francisation
Another goal I had set at the start of the year was learning French properly. The university offered nothing useful in that regard. It was Pedro who pointed me toward Quebec’s government-funded francisation classes for newcomers. The Centre de formation générale des adultes was a ten-minute walk from campus.
When I went to register, the woman at the desk spoke exclusively French and had to evaluate my level. I stitched together broken sentences from memory. It didn’t come across as much. Beginner level it was.
But within a few weeks, something interesting happened. Fragments of childhood French combined with fluency in Romanian, a Latin language like French, roots began clicking into place. Vocabulary accelerated. Patterns emerged.
So I was bumped up a level or two. It felt like I was on the right path. Well on my way to adapt and integrate into my new life in French-Canada.
Routine into the Storm
Between language classes, Jonquière license expeditions, PhD coursework, and research work, I barely had time to breathe. But it was structured. Productive. Forward-moving. A couple times a week, Alexandre and I would make our “shopping expedition” — a half-hour walk through snow-covered streets to Place du Royaume, with a mandatory stop at Archambault along the way. Life was cold, busy, and routine. Until mid-March.
Sometimes the waterfall just completely froze
Another winter storm was forecast — strong winds, heavy snowfall. The university closed for the day. Nothing unusual. The next day I returned to find the campus in complete blackout. The storm had damaged major power lines. Parts of the town were without electricity. I made my way to our office using my phone flashlight. Inside, a few colleagues were sitting in pitch darkness, casually talking. Our office had no windows. This never bothered me much, but Alexandre hated it. We chatted in the dark for a while, laughed at the absurdity, then left. No work accomplished.
The following day was another write-off. I can’t even remember if it was still the outage, another storm, or just institutional confusion. The week was dissolving. At some point I joked to my friends: Just watch, Friday’s excuse is going to be a University shutdown because of that coronavirus thing. The news had been escalating into fear mongering. China. Italy. Numbers rising. Dramatic headlines.
Then Friday came. And with it, a state of emergency. The university closed. The province shut down. The world closed itself off. And just like that, routine evaporated. Me and my big mouth.
The New World Order — Life during the COVID-19 lockdown
Early into the first lockdown, I have to admit I felt a selfish sense of vindication. A quiet, petty sort of justice. For months I had been navigating life in a place where I barely spoke the language and knew only a couple of people. Isolation had been my baseline. And now, suddenly, everyone else was getting a taste of it.
Welcome to my world.
Time stopped dripping here. The world held its breath, and winter simply kept sculpting what was already still
At the same time, I secretly welcomed the abrupt pause. My schedule had been escalating into overload — PhD work, language classes, driving exam shenanigans, constant self-imposed pressure. The world hitting pause felt… convenient. I expected it to last a week. Maybe two. And then it just kept going.
Mask mandates appeared. Supermarket floor arrows dictated which direction you could walk, as if we were items on a conveyor belt. Entire stores closed. Curfews were introduced. News cycles amplified panic daily. Then came the toilet paper crisis. One of the stranger collective breakdowns of modern civilization.
Meanwhile, my mom in Romania described increasingly rigid restrictions there. At one point, people had to fill out official declaration papers justifying why they were leaving their homes. It triggered flashbacks for her — memories of life under Ceaușescu’s communist regime, when movement and speech were tightly controlled.
The longer the restrictions lasted, the more frustration built. The virus itself wasn’t what weighed on me most. It was the scale of disruption. The sense that normal life had been switched off indefinitely.
Remote Everything
The lockdown halted my French learning completely. At first, the school closed. Weeks later they began discussing remote options. But by then something inside me had shifted. My motivation drained slowly, almost imperceptibly. What was the point?
The surface freezes while the current moves on. Stillness and Motion.
University research continued from home. At that stage, most of my work involved literature review, so technically it was manageable. Psychologically, it was another story. For some of us, the university environment was essential — a mental trigger that said: now we work. At home, especially in small studio apartments, the boundaries collapsed. The same room that was for sleeping and relaxing became the office, classroom, gym, cafeteria. It blurred everything.
The university experimented with remote courses. It was… rough. At first, everyone tried. Professors adapting to Zoom. Students attempting to focus. But attention spans eroded quickly. Small distractions became irresistible. Changing backgrounds. Flipping someone’s screen. Eventually most students logged in, turned off their cameras and microphones, and disappeared into parallel lives while the professor lectured into the void. I often used that time to cook or clean. Assignments replaced exams. Everyone passed. I retained very little.
The longer the lockdown dragged on, the more pointless everything began to feel. The one concrete achievement of that period was my driver’s license. After all the failures and bus rides through frozen Saguenay, finally passing felt disproportionately triumphant. A small win in a shrinking world.
A Dead Campus
Fighting persistently on our behalf, our supervisor managed to secure limited access to the university for our research group. Strict rules, of course. Masks at all times. Only certain rooms permitted. Not our windowless office, but Lucie’s windowless lab-office. It was something.
The branches held their shape. Everything else waited. Frost simply finished what pause had started
When I think of UQAC now, I mostly remember it as it was during that period: a silent, cold building where you had to ring a security guard to enter. Empty hallways. Fluorescent lighting humming over abandoned corridors. It felt like living a post-apocalypse survival video game.
Apart from each other and supermarket outings, Alexandre and I hadn’t seen people in months. The streets were dead. The first time we saw our supervisor in person again, we talked for hours. Complained. Reflected. Laughed. It felt strangely profound — as if we had all returned from separate planets. Human contact had become a novelty.
The Slow Summer Shift
Weeks passed. Then a month. Finally, our supervisor pulled off another small miracle: approval for one month of fieldwork in August up north for her entire research group of four. Alexandre was relieved. Energized. It felt like movement. Progress. Normalcy.
I felt… nothing. What had begun as quiet vindication had slowly dissolved into indifference. I remember preparing supplies at the university and running into an old colleague, Tague. He was genuinely excited for us. “You guys must be thrilled!” I shrugged. Meh.
The cold had pressed pause so long the world forgot warmth. Yet here, on sun-heated rock, life tests its wings once more, slow and deliberate
In hindsight, I think something subtle had been settling in. Not dramatic, nor cinematic. Just a quiet flattening of emotion. A kind of functional numbness. I went through the motions. I did what needed to be done. But the internal spark, the ambition and momentum I had carried into 2020, had dimmed.
It would take a long time to recognize it for what it probably was. A slow, quiet form of depression.
Following my rough landing in Quebec, I was settling into early PhD life in Canada, slowly building a routine in Chicoutimi. My daily commute traced a familiar path: starting from the shores of the Saguenay, climbing the steep hill toward the cathedral, passing the CEGEP and its long stone wall, then continuing up yet another incline all the way to the doors of UQAC. It wasn’t a long distance, but it was a relentless one — a daily reminder that nothing here would come easily.
Early PhD Student Life
One of the first major differences I noticed between Europe and North America was how PhD candidates are treated by their institutions. In most European countries, PhD students are considered employees. Whether through contracts with the university or the research group, the general attitude is that you’re part of the research staff — junior, yes, but staff nonetheless.
In North America, however, you are firmly a student. You don’t receive a salary; you receive a grant. You don’t automatically gain elevated access to labs or resources. In many ways, you’re treated no differently than an undergraduate who might still be figuring out where their next lecture is. For many of us Europeans, this distinction was immediately noticeable — and not particularly well liked.
Roadmap ahead
That said, I would have two mandatory courses to take in my second semester, while my first one focused on independent PhD research work. At this stage, my “research” consisted almost entirely of information gathering for what they called a research proposal. In practice, it was an exam — an extensive written report and a formal presentation at the end of the semester, used to determine whether you were deemed fit to continue as a PhD candidate.
At first, the idea of having to prove myself again after already landing the position felt mildly irritating. But in hindsight, it was actually a solid approach. The process forced us to define the scope of our projects early, while also thinking through logistics, feasibility, and costs — all things that would become painfully important later on.
Historical Park of Sainte-Anne’s Cross on the north side of Chicoutimi
My time at the University of Copenhagen had prepared me well for steep learning curves, so the research proposal itself didn’t worry me much. The courses, however… those were a different matter. They were supposed to be taught in French.
How, exactly, was I supposed to pass university-level courses in a language I could barely understand?
The Sergeant
During our first weeks there, Alexandre and I had already heard one of our course professors mentioned several times by our supervisor, Lucie. She spoke fluent English but retained a strong French accent — normally not an issue, except for one small problem.
Neither of us could quite understand the professor’s name. All we got was Sergeant Barnes.
Alexandre and I exchanged looks, silently wondering what kind of military drill instructor we were about to encounter. Was this man going to bark orders at us? Make us march? Fail us out of spite?
South side of the Parc de la Rivière-du-Moulin
After weeks of mystery, the Sergeant revealed herself to be Sarah Jane Barnes — a highly respected English geologist teaching at UQAC. Together with her husband, she would be responsible for the handful of courses we were required to take.
Bizarro World
In what felt like a linguistic reverse uno card, the two professors turned out to be fluent French speakers with the harshest English accents my ears had ever been subjected to. So strong, in fact, that even native French students sometimes struggled to understand them — and would occasionally mutter that they wished the courses were taught in English instead.
It was truly bizarro world.
As October rolled in, it brought with it the cool, pre-winter air
Fortunately, “the Sergeant” turned out to be both sharp and considerate. Early on, she asked the class whether we would prefer the course to be taught in French or English. On that particular course, non–French speakers were actually in the majority. With even the French speakers’ approval, we continued in English.
From what I gathered, this was not something UQAC was particularly thrilled about — which made the situation even more ironic.
An international university… right?
Priorities
Courses aside, I clearly had to start learning French sooner or later — if nothing else, simply to improve my quality of life. I asked at the university what options they had for language courses, but these were limited to specific semesters. Eventually, I realized my best option was the government-sponsored French courses for immigrants. Free of charge. I would start the following year.
For now, the priority was getting past the PhD candidature exam.
Just a little Saguenay duck scratching an itch
Another aspect discussed with my supervisor was the need for a valid driver’s license the following year. This was, after all, North America, and I couldn’t realistically get anywhere — let alone do fieldwork — without driving. My old Romanian driver’s license had expired a couple of years earlier, and since I hadn’t used a car in a long time, I never renewed it.
Another thing to deal with next year.
The tasks were slowly mounting for 2020. I was already foreseeing a heavy workload for at least the first half of the year…
Heh. I had no idea what was truly coming. But I guess none of us did…
Small Town, Limited Options
During my free time, I took the opportunity to familiarize myself with Chicoutimi and its places of interest. There weren’t that many. The town center was essentially a single street lined with stores, bars, and a handful of restaurants.
Alexandre and I tried them one by one, but — how can I put it — the quality was mediocre at best.
Even Turalyon (Alexandre’s cat) was unimpressed
I’m fairly sure neither of us will ever forget a certain pizza we ordered once. It was so overloaded with low-quality industrial sausage, cheese, and astonishing amounts of salt that it felt like they were aggressively compensating quantity for quality.
Other options included the typical North American fast food, especially Quebec’s beloved poutine. I kept hearing locals rave about it, so I finally gave it a try. For the uninitiated, in its most primal form, poutine consists of deep-fried fries topped with a strange, gummy-textured cheese curd and drowned in gravy.
It was… certainly something. I’m still not sure I would have categorized it as food.
With limited options for eating out or ordering in, we were left exploring the wondrous offerings of Walmart. Like… Pogos. Another deep-fried favorite — now also frozen. Essentially a wiener in a bun… on a stick.
Ah. The joys of Chicoutimi.
My daily commutes through endless residential neighborhoods
On the days Alexandre and I didn’t meet up, I used the opportunity to improve my cooking skills and prepare my own meals. It was cheaper and infinitely better. In the following months, I also discovered higher-quality supermarkets like IGA and Provigo. These at least offered a wider selection of meats and produce — and even some decent cheese, which my very critical French friend actually approved of.
Ah, Chicoutimi. You were definitely an experience.
A New Sanctuary
Despite the many eyebrow-raising experiences, Chicoutimi did manage to provide me with a sanctuary.
I mentioned in older posts how, whenever I move somewhere new, I inevitably end up finding a place that simply clicks with me — somewhere I return to when I need calm, clarity, or just space to think.
A large natural park following the Moulin River from the southern outskirts of the town all the way north to the Saguenay River. Coincidentally, the northern entrance to the park wasn’t far from my place, and one of its many exits led straight to the large shopping area with the supermarkets, shops, and the gym I had signed up for.
Waterfall and rapids along the Moulin river
In the turbulent years that followed, the park became more than just a refuge from troubling thoughts. It turned into my almost daily (or every-other-day) trekking route — roughly 8 kilometers — whether I was heading to the gym, the shops, or the university.
Rain or shine. Breeze or blizzard. Plus or minus thirty degrees.
Quebec City
In November, our research group prepared for a short trip. Quebec Mine — one of the annual mining and research conferences — was coming up, and all of us were attending. It would also be my first time in Quebec City.
Château Frontenac, one of the most iconic buildings in Quebec CIty
Having been there before, Alexandre was excited to show me around one of the more civilized and urbanized parts of Quebec. Our supervisor gave us a budget limit per night and allowed us to book our own accommodation.
We, uh… chose a pretty dang nice one. Barely within budget, of course. Hotel Manoir D’Auteuil.
Each room had its own name and theme, and somehow, they placed the two of us in the chapel. Name aside, it was easily the most opulent hotel room I had ever stayed in — elevated beds, rustic furniture, and a marble-clad bathroom with an absurdly inviting bathtub.
Welcome to the chapel at Hotel Manoir D’Auteuil
The one and only downside was the bathroom floor, which remained brutally cold at all times.
Otherwise? 10 out of 10 — would chapel again.
The Conference
The conference took place mid-semester and was modest in size, drawing mostly local Quebec professors, researchers, and mining industry experts, with a handful of attendees from elsewhere in Canada. Most participants were French speakers, but the lectures themselves were held in English so that non-French speakers like me could follow along.
I spent most of my time attending talks and meeting new people, including my second supervisor, Stéphane — a highly respected professor from UQAM (Université du Québec à Montréal).
In the evenings, Alexandre and I would stroll around the beautiful old city center of Quebec
Despite the increased socializing, my limited French once again came back to haunt me. Conversations would usually start with a bit of small talk in English, only to abruptly flip into French. I’d catch a few words here and there, maybe even the occasional sentence, but following along was exhausting. Eventually, my brain learned to quietly phase out whenever discussions went fully French — something I had experienced before in Denmark when surrounded by Danish friends.
The Challenge Bowl
The highlight of the conference for me was a contest I decided to take part in — the Challenge Bowl, as they called it. Entry was free, I needed some entertainment, and best of all, it was entirely in English.
We were paired up in teams of two and thrown into a series of multiple-choice trivia challenges focused on geophysics. Now, I am not a geophysicist. I had absolutely no business being there. Then again, neither did my randomly assigned partner. A dream team, really.
Taking part in the 2019 Challenge Bowl
Giving up was obviously not an option, so I told him we’d simply try to figure out the pattern of right and wrong answers as we went along and see if we could beat the system. As with many things that come out of my mouth, it was mostly a joke. Mostly.
Yet the more we succeeded, the more I began to believe in my apparently undisputed ability to click the correct button at exactly the right time. Toward the end, things became more tense — wrong answers now cost points, while speed still mattered. Speed, however, was always on our side… because we didn’t really need to stop and think. The magic finger decided.
Victory in Sight
My partner could barely contain his laughter as we somehow kept pulling ahead, trolling our way up the scoreboard. As the final rounds approached and the prospect of actually winning became real, we both grew increasingly uneasy — and slightly horrified — by the effectiveness of our strategy.
The grand prize was $2,000 toward a trip to the national finals in Alberta.
I told my partner to imagine the two of us — complete clowns with minimal knowledge of the subject — marching into the national finals of a geophysics competition. If my enchanted button-clicking finger had carried us this far, surely it could take us even further. Barely a few months in Canada, and the Romanian was already trolling his way toward the top.
Almost got’em. Congratulations to the well deserved winners!
Fortunately for everyone involved, we just lost first place to a team that actually knew what they were doing. We happily took second place instead — grinning like idiots.
What a blast that was.
Evenings in Quebec
When we had time in the evenings, Alexandre and I wandered through Quebec City’s old town. It was easily the most European-looking place I had seen in Canada — or at least the most European part of a city. Cobblestone streets, old stone buildings, narrow alleys… I loved it.
Famous wall mural in Quebec’s old town center
Step just a few blocks outside of it, though, and you were instantly back in familiar North American territory. Wide roads, modern sprawl, and parking lots. It felt like a city within a city.
Still, it was several leagues above Chicoutimi, and it didn’t take long before we both found ourselves wishing we lived there instead. Once the conference wrapped up, we boarded the bus and headed back north to Saguenay — where a fully entrenched winter was now waiting for us.
The Final Grind
The rest of the semester passed in a blur of focused isolation. We hunkered down, grinding away on our research proposals and preparing for the decisive exam. At one point, I even recruited my mother over Skype to act as a practice audience for my presentation. Awkward? Very. Useful? Surprisingly so.
In the days leading up to the exam, I felt the need to give myself something to look forward to — a reminder that this wasn’t a life-or-death situation. A reward on the other side of the stress.
Greeted by the eternal white and cold back in Saguenay
Looking back, it was almost absurd to realize this was still the same year. 2019 had already seen me move back to Copenhagen, nearly relocate to Switzerland, embark on an unforgettable journey across Greece, visit Lithuania, and finally uproot my life to Canada.
So I decided to end it properly. One last adventure to crown the year of all years.
If I passed the exam… I would go to New York for the Christmas holidays.
After four years of living in Denmark, I left Copenhagen behind. My permanent destination was Canada, where I would start a new life as a PhD student somewhere in Quebec. My first flight took me to a familiar temporary stop in Reykjavík. Considering my incredible two-week adventure in Iceland a few years earlier, it felt like a fitting place to say goodbye to the last westward edge of the European continent. Looking back, I didn’t know it yet, but this journey would mark a rough landing in Quebec — the true beginning of my life in Canada.
A short stop in Iceland on my way to Canada
The transatlantic flight followed — hours above the ocean, then even more hours above the blinding white ice sheet of Greenland, followed by a long pass over the countless lakes and flatlands of northern Canada. Inch by inch, closer to my destination, until I finally landed in Montreal sometime during the night.
My first brief time in Montreal
Exhausted from the long flight, I jumped into a taxi as soon as I could and headed to the nearby hotel I had booked — Beausejour Hotel Apartments, from the 22nd to the 23rd of August. I still have it saved in my Bookings account. A simple room, but with an enormous king-sized bed — larger than anything I’d ever slept in before. I ordered myself a pizza and promptly passed out in that royal bed.
From Europe to the Fjordlands of Quebec
The following day brought the final leg of the journey: a local flight from Montreal to Saguenay. Saguenay is a region in Quebec, north of Quebec City, encompassing three towns spread around the Saguenay Fjord. Tucked into a bay to the east lies the small town of La Baie, while to the west stands the larger, more industrial-looking Jonquière. Between them sits Chicoutimi — the most populous of the three, and home to the Université du Québec à Chicoutimi (UQAC), my new workplace for the next four years.
The Université du Québec à Chicoutimi in Chicoutimi, Québec
Before leaving for Canada, I had tried to contact my main supervisor regarding my arrival date and accommodation options. In a previous email, she had mentioned that she could temporarily house me until I found a place of my own. However, despite several attempts, I never received a reply. I even reached out to my second supervisor in Montreal to ask if he knew anything, but he didn’t — suggesting she might be away doing remote fieldwork during that period.
This shot was actually from my trans-Atlantic flight. I just loved the sharp limit between land and glacier and thought to include it here
With nowhere to go, I decided to book a “cheap” hotel for a week. Surprisingly, it wasn’t very cheap at all for what seemed like a small, remote town in the middle of nowhere in Quebec. Apparently, Chicoutimi is a bit of a summer holiday destination for locals. Regardless, my options were limited. After landing in Saguenay, I made my way to Hotel du Parc in Chicoutimi.
Culture Shock, Served at Lunch
It was late morning or early noon when I checked in. I dropped my things and went down to the hotel restaurant to have lunch. This is where my cultural shock began.
Hotel du Parc in Chicoutimi
Despite being a hotel, the staff spoke very limited English — the restaurant staff even less. My French at this point was extremely basic, despite having theoretically learned some during early school years. I knew enough to ask for lunch: déjeuner. The waitress then began explaining that they no longer served déjeuner, only dîner.
Dinner? At noon?
What followed was a clumsy, drawn-out back-and-forth until I finally understood that in Quebec French, déjeuner means breakfast, dîner means lunch, and souper means dinner. Whereas in “standard” French, breakfast is petit-déjeuner, lunch is déjeuner, and dinner is dîner. Oh gods… even ordering food at a hotel was complicated. What a start.
Setting out in Chicoutimi for the first time, along the large Talbot boulevard
Another amusing detail from that first meal was noticing bottles of homemade ketchup for sale. Up to that point, I had only ever seen the standard processed red goop everyone calls ketchup — never the jam-like, artisanal-looking stuff. I was tempted, but this was not the time for ketchup.
Lost in Translation (and Hallways)
With Google Maps in hand, I slowly made my way toward the university. It was time to find out whether my supervisor was still alive.
On the way, I passed a local budget telecom shop and quickly picked up a cheap prepaid Canadian phone number. There, at least, they spoke English — giving me a brief sense of relief. That relief was short-lived.
Oh and there were a lot of Marmots all over the place. They should’ve just renamed Chicoutimi to Marmotville
At the university reception, I began explaining to the lady behind the desk that I was an international PhD student starting there for the first time and that I was looking for my supervisor’s office — Lucie Mathieu. Her eyes widened. She struggled to form a few words in English.
Oh no. Even here? At an international university?
I knew Quebec was French-speaking, but I hadn’t expected people to speak no English at all — especially within a university, in an otherwise majority English-speaking country. I slowed my speech and reduced my vocabulary to survival mode:
That, at least, she understood. She wrote down a floor and office number and attempted to explain how to get there. I only half understood that part.
I wandered through the labyrinth that was the UQAC building and eventually found Lucie’s office. I knocked, smiled, and introduced myself. She greeted me warmly.
And here are some campus marmots
After a light-hearted conversation about my failed attempts to reach her, my concern that she might no longer be alive, and my first impressions of Quebec so far, she gave me a few practical tips and suggested I take the next few days to settle in and find accommodation. She also introduced me to part of her research group — among them Adrien, the Master’s student responsible for posting the PhD position in the EUGEN group where I had first found it.
A Week of Adjustment
What followed was a week filled with further culture shock and growing frustration, mostly due to ongoing communication barriers.
Throughout the days, place after place, I kept running into the same language barrier. Stores. Restaurants. Service counters. Even when I went to schedule an appointment to open a bank account with Desjardins, I could barely get by in English. In the end, I asked Adrien to come with me to the appointment — because not being able to properly communicate with the person opening your bank account is, frankly, a bit much.
Ironically, that particular employee turned out to speak fluent English.
The bridge across the Saguenay in Chicoutimi
After having traveled through several foreign countries in Europe and being completely confident that English would always get me by, this experience became increasingly disappointing. More and more, in the coming months, I found myself reluctant to go anywhere or do anything at all — simply because of the language barrier. I never, in a million years, expected to experience culture shock in Canada of all places.
Quebec Is (and Isn’t) Its Own Thing
I considered saying now that I slowly learned Quebec was truly its own thing, separate from Canada — but that would be a lie. It wasn’t. Apart from the language, it felt as North American as anywhere else.
The spread-out residential neighborhoods. The “paper houses” — non-brick constructions that felt fragile compared to European buildings. The extremely car-centric town layouts, with multi-lane highways cutting straight through urban areas. The lack of sidewalks in many places. The enormous, one-story commercial buildings surrounded by seas of parking lots. And of course, the omnipresent fast-food culture.
Chicoutimi extending out on both sides of the Saguenay river
Yes, the Québécois had their local quirks — their own customs, expressions, and French heritage — but to me, they were still as Canadian as the rest of the country.
I should also add that, in my experience, the lack of English wasn’t due to people refusing to speak it, as some Quebec-haters like to claim. Not at all. Most simply didn’t know English well enough. From conversations I had with locals, they learned some English in school, but then never used it and gradually lost it — much like my own French.
The key point was that they didn’t need to. Most rarely traveled to English-speaking regions. A kind of cultural and linguistic self-isolation.
Saint-François-Xavier Cathedral, a familiar sight in Chicoutimi
I also never sensed any widespread English-hating attitude. Surely, such people exist — they do everywhere — but it wasn’t the general sentiment. On the contrary, many people, despite their broken and limited English, were kind and genuinely curious about me as a foreigner. Perhaps because I wasn’t their English-Canadian “enemy,” but rather someone clearly trying to integrate. I don’t know.
The Hunt for an Apartment
After stocking up on food from a not-at-all-nearby supermarket — because everything was so damn far thanks to that car-centric town design — I began searching for rental apartments online.
I quickly found the local classifieds website: Kijiji. From furniture to vehicles to apartments, everything was listed there. I started sending out inquiries.
At first, I wrote long, detailed messages in English explaining who I was and that I was looking to rent a studio apartment. None of them received replies. So I switched tactics and began sending much shorter messages in French, heavily assisted by Google Translate.
Days passed. Still no replies. My hotel stay was coming to an end, and desperation began creeping in. It was time to stop hiding behind messages and pick up the phone.
Phone Calls, Panic, and One Miracle
I started the calls the same way I always had — straight in English. That went nowhere. Then I adjusted again, opening in broken French and asking if the person spoke English. The answer was usually a simple: Non, désolé. Eventually, I wrote down a few French sentences for myself — just enough to explain my situation concisely over the phone.
Saguenay City Hall, one of the few nice stone buildings in Chicoutimi, together with the Cathedral
One of the listings was for a nice-looking, unfurnished studio apartment by the shores of the Saguenay. I called. The man on the other end immediately launched into several minutes of rapid-fire speech — in what must have been the thickest Saguenay French dialect imaginable. I didn’t understand a single word.
I had to cut him off.
Uh… oh… désolé… mon français n’est pas bon… euh… j’utilise Google Translate…
As hilarious and frustrating as the conversation was, I have to give the man credit — he didn’t hang up. Somehow, through repeated excuse-moi, requests to speak slower, and constant repetition, we reached a fragile half-understanding.
Walking along the Vieux-port de Chicoutimi, I encountered this chicken
Yes, the apartment was available. Yes, we could schedule a visit. The time… maybe 5 PM?
I wasn’t sure. Stress levels were high. But I decided: fuck it. I’d go there at 5 and hope for the best. And I got it right.
Carl, the Accent, and a Cheap Studio
Carl, the owner, greeted me with a warm smile — and an absolutely legendary Saguenay accent. One so thick that, as I later learned, not even French speakers understood it. In person, though, everything became easier. The hand gestures helped a lot.
The apartment was genuinely nice: one of four studio units on the second floor of a large house. Carl and his wife lived downstairs in a spacious, elegant first-floor apartment, while the studios above were all rented out.
The location was one of the best in Chicoutimi. The rent was dirt cheap — around 400 dollars. His only real request was simple: be tranquil. No parties. No noise. Perfect.
Walking out of the apartment, I’d be greeted with this view of the Saguenay and marina. Not too shabby!
Somehow, against all odds, I had navigated the language barrier and landed myself a solid place to live. Now all I needed was furniture.
A Furnished Beginning
I got a lucky break with one of my neighbors, who was preparing to leave the country and needed to get rid of everything he owned. For next to nothing, he sold me an entire kitchen setup — utensils, pots, plates, even a vacuum cleaner and an electric oven — all for a mere 100 dollars. It was a fantastic start.
For the rest, I went to one of the local furniture chains, MeubleRD. I could have gone the second-hand route again, but this time I knew I’d soon have a decent income and I wanted, for once, to build a place that felt intentionally mine rather than a random collection of leftovers from other people’s lives.
The last summer days at the end of August in Chicoutimi
There was also a practical constraint: I didn’t own a car, and I didn’t plan on getting one. Carrying furniture across Chicoutimi wasn’t an option. So after browsing the store, I bought a few small items and ordered the most important pieces online, including a bed frame and a mattress. According to the website, delivery would take about a week. Until then, I slept on a mat and a sleeping bag in my large, empty room. It felt like camping indoors.
That week stretched into three due to stock issues and delays. My back was not happy, but at least I had a roof over my head.
Brothers in a Rough Landing
Just before the semester began, the final member of our research group arrived from France: Alexandre, another PhD student under the same supervisor. Beyond our shared academic path, we quickly discovered we had strikingly similar tastes in music, humor, and outlook. He also arrived with a gigantic Maine Coon cat, which instantly impressed me. We became friends almost immediately.
My first time discovering Parc de la Rivière-du-Moulin in Chicoutimi
His own apartment turned out to be… interesting — a euphemism for a place that turned out to be riddled with problems and awful neighbors, the kind of situation that slowly wears you down. He also got screwed over by one of the telecom companies when first trying to get a Canadian number. Apparently even speaking the local language fluently was no guarantee of a smooth landing.
I helped where I could. We split the haul of kitchenware I’d acquired, and I gave him the electric oven since I had no use for it while he desperately needed one. My own apartment, meanwhile, lacked a washing machine. I tried doing laundry at the university for a while, but the constant security checks made it a chore. Eventually, I began doing my weekly laundry at Alexandre’s place, which turned into our regular ritual of shared meals, drinks, and evenings of laughter and entertainment.
Into the Archean
Not long after the start of the semester, our supervisor took us on an organized field trip north to Chibougamau. Beyond its academic purpose, I quietly looked forward to it for a far simpler reason — it would be my first time sleeping in a proper bed after nearly ten days on the floor of my empty apartment.
The vast wilderness of central Quebec, only interrupted by the occasional high powerlines
Lucie was in her element out there. As our minibus pushed deeper into the vast nothingness north of Saguenay — endless forests, swamps, and lakes stretching to every horizon — she excitedly pointed out that, according to the geological maps, we had just crossed from the Proterozoic into the Archean. Two entirely different chapters of Earth’s history, separated by hundreds of millions of years… yet outside the window, nothing seemed to change. The wilderness stretched unbroken in every direction, with not a hint of civilization. The realization that the rocks beneath our feet had quietly shifted by two billion years without any visible sign was fascinating.
We were based at a roadside motel at the entrance to Chibougamau. Alexandre and I shared a room and couldn’t stop laughing at how it looked like something out of a crime movie — the kind of place where a man on the run hides from the police, nervously peeking through the curtains every time a car passes. I even started doing it as a joke, scanning the parking lot for imaginary cops, which only made us laugh harder.
Strange new rocks of primordial times
This was our first real immersion into the geology of the Canadian Shield and the Archean world of the Abitibi Greenstone Belt. Having once gone through the same shock herself, Lucie knew what awaited us: rocks more than two billion years old, heavily deformed, weathered, and nothing like the fresh, black basalt I had seen in Iceland.
For example, the “basalt” she pointed out in the field barely resembled anything I thought I knew. We were about to spend a long time relearning how to think in geological terms.
Our field trip crew during that first visit to Chibougamau
It was also our first, very mild encounter with the local flying menaces known as black flies. Thankfully, this late in the season and with the cool temperatures, they were little more than a minor annoyance. At the time, I had no idea what kind of terror they would become once summer arrived.
The Work Ahead
My project would cover multiple Archean formations across vast regions — not only the Abitibi in Quebec, but also the equally enormous Wabigoon Greenstone Belt in Ontario. The scope was intimidating.
That first semester was about orientation: understanding the geology, defining the project, and keeping up with coursework. In December, I would have to give a formal presentation as part of an exam that would determine whether I would be officially accepted into the PhD program. Until I passed it, nothing was guaranteed.
A sulfide bearing felsic Archean rock. One of many more to come
So I buried myself in Archean geology, coursework, and the slow, awkward process of building a life in a new place. By then, I had finished running the gauntlet of my rough landing in Quebec — and was finally ready to dig in.
The summer of 2017 was passing by fast and I was nearing the September deadline for submitting my Masters thesis. There was always the option to request an extension like most other students were doing, but I wanted to make a point of finishing mine in time. Another one of those little prideful quirks of mine. So the pressure was on.
I had no more time for fun cycling trips, or friendly night outs. I had also quit my Danish language classes earlier in the year and my part-time job early summer. This was the moment to fully devote my attention to my research and future.
I was in full crunch mode. By that point in my work, I had processed all the data that I gathered from my Icelandic rocks and I had a fairly solid narrative in mind to present my interpretations. Without going into details, I can say that some of the data was aligning with the existing narrative well, but a few oddball data points were sticking out and I made it my mission to try and find a good hypothesis to address them.
Long nights in the lab with my “precious” electron microprobe. Unlocking the geochemical secrets of my primitive olivines
After weeks of brain storming, now well into my thesis writing period, I had a “Eureka” moment to explain the outliers in my dataset. It was of course a very rough around the edges idea, but with help from my supervisors, I managed to stitch together a cohesive and plausible explanation.
Why am I writing about all this? Well, just to point out that amidst the long and hard working days in the summer of 2017, I was highly excited and was thoroughly enjoying my research work. So much so, that I began seriously pondering continuing down the academic path after my Masters.
I had discovered the true face of primitive olivines! Perhaps it was time to get off the probe and go for a walk
The call back to Iceland
During the later months of the summer I kept thinking back to the years of career stagnation after graduating in Romania. I was not about to let that happen again. So while working on the final parts of my thesis, I tentatively began to search for a PhD project. Mainly in the Nordic countries. In a surprisingly short time, I found a perfect PhD opportunity for myself at the University of Iceland. Why perfect? Because it was literally the continuation of my current research. Same specialization, same area, and focus-wise it was the next logical step with regards to the work I had done. I immediately applied.
Soon enough I got a positive reply and they invited me to an online interview and opportunity to present my Masters work. After the smooth presentation, I got one of the best reactions you could get. They asked me if I was doing a Masters there, or a PhD, since the workload was so vast. Suffice to say, they were very impressed, and I was extremely excited. It felt like a beautiful next step of my story… From Romania to Denmark, to Iceland, and beyond!
When the ship’s about to sail and you’re not on it, what can you do, but play along to the bittersweet tune of fate
Unfortunately, that was not to be my story. As eager as they were to hire me on the spot, there was a little problem. They needed me to have already graduated from my Masters and they couldn’t wait until after September. I even told them that I could try rushing my thesis out in the hopes of graduating sooner, but it was still not enough. They needed someone to start within the next few weeks.
It was such a blow to be so close, just to see the opportunity of a lifetime slip away… However, the experience had given me an unbelievable confidence boost. If I got this close to getting a PhD while I wasn’t even finished with my Masters, afterwards was going to be a cakewalk, surely, I thought.
Judgment day
On a beautiful sunny day at the end of summer 2017, in the dark depths of the students office at KU, a grand Master thesis was born. Forged in the fires of Iceland and molded in the underground labs of the Geocenter, this unholy manuscript of geological power was ready to be submitted for review, and unleashed upon the world at large.
Behold my GLORIOUS manuscript “New constraints of the source components for Icelandic magmas from primitive olivine and rocks“. Doesn’t that title just roll off the tongue?
I think I had about two weeks before my thesis defense. It was nice to relax and take a breath for a change. On some days I’d cycle around Copenhagen daydreaming about where fate would take me after this.
Iceland? Norway? Sweden? Switzerland? something more exotic like New Zealand perhaps? or would I just remain in Denmark and embrace the hygge for the rest of my life? If before I felt I could see my path laid out before me with relative certainty, now things were unclear… Hidden by a fog of uncertainty. But it was exciting!
Nothing is impossible, but how far are you willing to go?
In no time, the day of my thesis defense was upon me. I held my presentation in front of a small room of colleagues, friends and professors. When in previous years I had presentation anxiety, this time I was as solid as a rock. Pun intended. But seriously, after the months I had spent meticulously combing through my data, reading literature and writing my thesis, I could easily talk about my work in my sleep.
After the presentation, I remained in the examination room with just my supervisors and an external examiner. It was “grilling” time. The three of them fired a plethora of questions at me. We sat and discussed various interesting points of my work. Some critiques, but for the most part, a lot of positive feedback. After a sweat-inducing two and a half hours of grilling, I came out of the room… medium-rare!
The verdict
After a few minutes of deliberating, they called me back in to give me their final thoughts and verdict. There could have been a few improvements made here and there, but overall it was a very good manuscript and considering all the work I put into it over the past year, they gave me the top mark! I almost fell out of my seat! I was hoping for a high mark, but this?? Top grade on a Masters thesis from one of Europe’s most prestigious Universities? I did not see that coming.
As opposed to Anakin Skywalker, I was granted the rank of Master with flying colors!
My supervisor also presented me with the results of some fresh isotope analysis he had done on my outlier samples. This was not part of my thesis, but more of a curiosity side-study to check my hypothesis. The data confirmed my assumptions! Without saying a word, Paul Martin just gave me a proud look with a big grin on his face that just filled me with pride and joy. It was the cherry on top of the cake for me.
Post-exam mood surrounded by my KU friends and colleagues
What followed was an afternoon of celebration with friends and colleagues. For the Danes, it was customary for family members to attend the graduate celebration, but for me in that moment, they, my friends and colleagues were my family.
We had cake and drinks and blasted “We are the champions” by Queen on the speakers in the class room. That feeling of relief and elation was something else… Something magical. A feeling that lasted for days to come.
Aftermath
My supervisor and I had plans to submit my work to a scientific journal after some needed refinement. This, I thought, would also boost my chances to land a PhD. Two weeks we said. It will take us two weeks. Five years later… our hard work got published. It was no fault of either of us, but between his busy schedule and my job searching, it took painfully long… Even after so many years though, it felt good seeing my heavily frankensteined work finally get published.
Back in the fall of 2017 though, I was more actively looking for the next career opportunity. As the weeks and months passed by, I would slowly broaden my search. One of the main countries I was eyeing had become New Zealand. Mostly thanks to a Kiwi professor we had at KU and a Kiwi girl I met and got close to the year before – I can hear you groaning and rolling your eyes, reader! The point is that it was thanks to them that I began thoroughly researching New Zealand and discovered the spectacular beauty of that country. From afar, of course.
I got in contact with a few professors from Auckland and Otago and there was clear interests on both sides. However, the New Zealand PhD application process was not in my favor. As opposed to Europe, the professors there only had funding for the research itself and not for the candidate’s salary/grant. Doctorate wages in New Zealand are given out as scholarships by government institutions. This leads to a very rigid point-based system where candidates with the best overall grades from undergrad and post-grad get offered the grants.
You work and play so hard that you risk getting drunk on your euphoria and overconfidence, blinding you to the mountains of hurdles and hardships before you. And when your pick breaks… the music stops
My high level research and top-grade thesis didn’t even count in that bureaucratic systems eyes. Suffice to say, my overall average grades were not good enough, frustrating both me and the professors alike.
The grind begins anew
As 2017 rolled into 2018, my frustration was growing by the day. There I was once more in the same situation as before… Jobless, uncertain, with hopes and dreams slowly eroding away. Ever widening my search parameters. Not limiting myself anymore to certain countries, or academic paths.
In early 2018, I managed to get a four month internship at the Geological Survey of Denmark and Greenland through the help of my examiner, who happened to work at GEUS. Each time, something like this would happen, I’d start wondering if this was a sign. A sign that I was on the right path and this was the door opening towards my glorious future. Trying to find abstract justification for why certain things in the past hadn’t worked out. It was all in the plan! Right? Right?? All my past excitement about the unknown was slowly turning into dread.
The sad reality was that in Denmark and Europe in general there just weren’t many jobs in my career. With a dwindling oil and gas industry and an almost absent mining industry, all that was left for geologists to do was work in the civil sector, meaning you had to be fluent in the local language, or go down the academic path and risk getting caught in an endless loop of study and poorly payed research jobs. And as much time as I spent learning Danish, I was still far from a work-level fluency.
The year 2018 was shaping up to a very uncertain and turbulent year. But not one without its moments of crazy fun and adventure!
It was now June 2016 and summer was upon us in Denmark. My financial crisis was over and I had settled into my new routine, balancing study and work. We were nearing the end of the semester and the onset of summer break. I was happy to take a break from courses and begin focusing on my ambitious one-year thesis project on Iceland. However, this period also triggered a new crisis for me. A housing crisis…
The problem…
In one of my first posts about life in Denmark, I mentioned how difficult it could be to find an affordable place to stay in Copenhagen, especially as a foreign student. The Housing Foundation was a relatively easy, albeit pricey, solution for first-year students. But their contracts would only cover the first year of study, and mine was nearing its end.
I got my two legs to stand on, but now I lost my upper body – Uh oh! – Sculpture from The Glyptotek, Copenhagen
I began looking for other potential dorms, and housing portals a couple of months before the deadline, but this was already way too late. Waiting lists for some of the dorms in Copenhagen had people on them going back over a year. It was absurd!
I was getting tired of the never ending crisis, but it was time to “fight” once more, so head first right into the storm!
I searched through some of the major housing/rental websites too. There were seldom any studio apartments available. If I ever found one, the price would be too steep. Flat sharing was more common and affordable, but even that was hard to come by as demand exceeded supply.
Last, but not least I made sure to spread the word amongst my friends in hopes that they knew someone looking for a flat mate. Luckily I had no shortage of friends. I was also quickly making more friends in Danish language classes. However, it seemed like everyone was looking for a new place to stay…
At least I found the horse – south Amager, Denmark
Cycling and exploring
Potential homelessness aside, things were good. Whenever I had free time and decent weather, I’d get back on my bike and go explore new parts of Copenhagen and its surroundingas. In this regard, I had found a like-minded friend in Danish class: Marios from Greece. On one of our cycling trips we south of Copenhagen to explore the island of Amager.
Cycling along Sluseløbet in west Amager
Amager was a blend of the urban, ultra-modern south-side of the city of Copenhagen bordered by cow and horse filled pastures. A comically stark change back then. Not sure if it’s still the same today. Further south there were a few quiet towns, nice beaches and Copenhagen international airport (Kastrup). All of this within reasonable cycling distance.
Somewhere in Kalvebod Fælled, close to Kastrup airport in south Amager
Dyrehaven
On another occasion we cycled north-east of the capital, to Dyrehaven (Deer park). This was one of my favorite places to go outside of the city. The northeastern coastline leading to the park was gorgeous, especially on a sunny day. At the entrance of the 11 km2 park was Bakken, the worlds oldest working amusement park.
Horseback riding in Dyrehaven, very common across Denmark actually
Dyrehaven was crisscrossed by a web of trails all converging around the center of the park at the royal hunting lodge. On the wide trails we’d zig zag around trekkers, cyclers and the occasional horse carriage. The narrow forest trails were less crowded and way more fun for cycling.
Racing across the park
Across the wide park we’d often encounter groups of deer roaming around the ponds and forests. Every now and again we’d reach the fenced edge, reminding us that we were in a man-made park and not in the wild. For me, this was the one sad thing about Denmark. It’s so extensively developed that there’s barely any patches of wilderness left. At least on the eastern part of the country where I lived and traveled.
It was always a side quest to find the deer whenever I’d visit Dyrehaven
The crisis is over! for now…
Towards the end of June I found myself having a drink with some of my fellow student at the Geobar. I still hadn’t found a place to stay and I was supposed to move out of my dorm within a week. As I sat there complaining and being all mopey, my drunk friend Lasse says out of the blue: “Well why don’t you come live with me, buddy?”. He tells me the price he’s paying and considering the location and size of the place, it was crazy cheap! The explanation was that his uncle owned the place. It was too good to be true.
There’s my shocked expression when Lasse invited me to be his flat mate out of nowhere – The Glyptotek, Copenhagen
I thought he was surely joking; but no he wasn’t… Then I thought he was just saying that because he had one too many drinks at the time… yet, the next day when I brought it up again he was still onboard with the idea. Just like that, my crisis was solved. Well, at least for the time being. We agreed that I’d still be searching for another place while I’d be living with him. Something that would kind of slip my mind after a few months as I became more comfortable there.
Big DONG sticking out in Amager, Denmark
His setup wasn’t really meant for long-term squatters, but I made the best of it. We got ahold of mattress, threw it on the floor in his study room and voila! Home sweet home. Well, sort of. Hey, it worked for the time and by splitting his already low rent, I was saving some good money too!
Another crisis averted, could I actually relax for a change, or was the next one right around the corner?
A travel-packed summer
After settling all of my problems in the first half of 2016, I was ready for a fun, travel-packed summer.
During July, I took a few days to hop over to Germany and see my mom who was visiting our relatives in Wuppertal. All I recall from that trip was visiting this funny park with some quirky modern art and décor. Another thing I recall was that at that time I was already planning to bring my mom over to Denmark for Christmas, so I was building up the hype for that.
Being eaten by a puffy German house – Wuppertal, Germany
Other than Germany, I had two big trips coming up. A two-week field work in Iceland for my Masters thesis and a glorious return to Norway, to visit my good friend Daniel, who had recently moved to Trondheim. It was truly going to be an epic summer. One of my fondest to date!
By the end of April, 2016, my roommate Nao’s student exchange period was over. He was going back to Japan and I was soon to get a new roommate. After his departure, one of the days I come back from university to find a small crew of cleaners on the job, making sure our room was in top shape for the new arrival. Just before I entered my room, I overheard them talking in Hungarian, so I greeted them in Hungarian and we started chatting. After some small talk, I was quick to inquire if their company was hiring students for part-time work. One of the guys, Gyuri recommends I write to his former employer, Inger, who owns a cleaning company, as she’ll usually hire people for part-time work.
The light at the end of the tunnel
I wasted no time and sent an email to Inger that afternoon. I wrote that I was a friend of Gyuri and I was desperately in need of work and looking to prove myself. The next morning I received a reply. She states that they had issues with Gyuri in the past due to recreational drug use and had fired him. So based on this she was very reluctant on hiring any of his “friends”… My man Gyuri had almost gotten me hired and fired at the same time.
The moment you realize the light at the end of the tunnel is a train coming your way
I immediately wrote back to Inger explaining that I had actually only met Gyuri and that he was kind enough to offer me her contact. I threw in some apologies, regrets and a pinch of desperate groveling. Shortly after, she replied that she will give me a chance and called me in for the formal interview.
Finally! After half a year of job searching and job applications I scored something! All thanks to a chance encounter with a couple of Hungarian cleaners in my student dorm.
A quirky job
The interview was smooth and casual. At the start, they gave me a few temporary cleaning gigs as a replacement for some of their regular staff. My first job was a late-night cleaning adventure at a high-end executive employment office. The client was very picky about their spotless cleanliness so I was asked to take extra care. I took my time and spent an extra hour overtime without asking for extra pay, just to make sure everything was perfect.
The fancy executive office next to Amelieborg, where I started my part-time work
My supervisor, Irina was very pleased and tentatively asked me if I could possibly help her with another gig that night. By this time it was past midnight, but I didn’t care. I was up for a late night cleaning extravaganza. We then drove over to this famous Danish sexologist’s office. Irina was telling me how their regular cleaner there was a shy Muslim fellow who was covering his eyes while cleaning for months because of the lewd paintings and sculptures on display all over the place. It was certainly the oddest office I’ve tended to, but luckily we only had to do a basic floor cleaning and trash tiding. No touching the displays and… toys…
The big contract
After a couple of weeks doing these replacement jobs, the cleaning company gave me my big stable contract. I was going to be their main cleaning guy tending to VICE media‘s Copenhagen office.
The beautiful old downtown building housing VICE media’s office on the top floors
It was a huge office space. This was great for me as this one contract perfectly covered the amount of hours I needed per week to be eligible for the SU-grant. Two week-days of 3.5 hours in the evenings and one 8 hour day on the weekend. This was a good stable schedule that I could work with. I would also have Danish language classes on the same weekdays, Mondays and Wednesdays.
Thus began my busy student schedule for the rest of 2016, where during the week I’d have two full days of courses in the morning, Danish classes in the afternoon and work in the evening. In between I’d have my recovery days with just courses and studying and then my working weekend, with potentially one day off to relax and recharge.
A rainy May day at Amelieborg
It was a lot of work, but I felt like I had all the energy in the world. Then when the money from the job and SU-grant started coming in… I felt like a king! I could actually afford things now!
A long time desire
With my financial burden lifted, I rushed to fulfill one of my desires ever since I had moved to Copenhagen: getting a gym subscription.
For years, even before moving to Denmark, I had been trying to get into shape by exercising at home. But I looked forward to the day I could afford to go to a gym and have access to all the crazy machinery and contraptions. This desire only escalated when I moved and noticed there was a big FitnessDK gym (now SATS) next to my dorm in Østerbro.
Railway overpass to Østerbro
Flashback
Sometime during November of 2015, FitnessDK was offering a 1-day for free deal and I convinced my friend Eddy to join me for a few hours of physical exercise. He was mostly interested in improving his cycling stamina, while I wanted to test everything out and do a hardcore full body workout. I treated this like I would any other freebie deal: Need to take full advantage! So I spent almost 3 hours working out every muscle to the limit… this when I had never been to a gym before, nor had I ever been the sporty type.
My whole body was numb after the workout. That night I woke up with severe muscle soreness and my arms folded up like little T-rex hands. The muscles were so tensed up that I couldn’t stretch my arms out. Everything hurt so much that I didn’t leave my room for the next couple of days. I could barely even lift a cup of water without my arm shaking like crazy. Lesson learned…
One of my old gyms in central Copenhagen
When I finally got my gym subscription, I was going to do it the proper way. Slow and consistent. I cycled through a few YouTube fitness channels over the next months until I landed on AthleanX, who I follow to this day. After all these years of continuing this hobby, I can happily say that I’m in the best shape I’ve ever been in and won’t be stopping my gym routine anytime soon!
When I moved to Denmark in autumn 2015, one of my plans was to get a foothold in the oil and gas sector in the region and end up moving to Norway. Ever since my uplifting trip to Norway years before, Norway became the promised land for me. I tried to apply to jobs there ever so often and I tried to go study there. In Denmark I felt so close that I could smell the salt water of the Norwegian fjords. Yet as I spent more time adjusting to Danish life it grew on me more and more.
A forest path somewhere around Hillerød, Denmark
After coming back from our geological field trip to Gran Canaria I had gained a new level of respect and appreciation for the Danes and their country. I could now see myself calling Denmark a home for the foreseeable future. Thus, my plans shifted away from Norway and I decided to better integrate into Danish society. The first and main step would be to learn the Danish language. Luckily as long as you have a CPR (local ID card) Danish language classes are free and offered across the country by the local municipality. I didn’t waste any time in signing up and from May 2016 I would being my late afternoon classes at Studieskolen.
Spring cycling
Spring had settled in and the fields and trees began blooming with flowers across the Danish lands. However, April weather was as schizophrenic as it could get. The daily recipe was a couple of hours of warm, beautiful sunshine, followed by half an hour of hail/rain and chilling winds.
On one of the better days I had planned a long cycling trip to the town of Hillerød, 36km north of Copenhagen.
Spring of 2016, Denmark
I was going to visit one of my Danish friends and colleagues, Jesper who lived in Hillerød. This was also my first time venturing well out of the Danish capital to explore new terrain. New places, adventures and things like that always got me excited.
The cycling lane pretty much followed the main vehicle road going north out of Copenhagen, all the way to Hillerød. On the way I got to bike around and explore new neighborhoods of the busy capital, followed by long stretches of calming countryside.
On the road to Hillerød
Patches of green, sprouting forests were often interrupted by small towns and villages. The road also presented three major hills to conquer. Despite what one would expect from a map, the Danish landscape isn’t as flat as you may think.
Hillerød
After a few hours of cycling and sweating, the final stretch of forest revealed the entrance sign to Hillerød. This final bit of the road to Hillerød with its many nature paths and tranquil forest was always my favorite.
The all too familiar gas station at the entrance to Hillerød
I soon met up with Jesper and we walked to the iconic landmark in the town center: Frederiksborg Castle. Built in the early 17th century, this elegant castle served as a summer residence for the Danish royal family for decades before being turned into a museum. With its numerous bedrooms, dining rooms and various chambers, the multistory castle is the largest Renaissance complex in the Nordic region.
Frederiksborg Castle entrance, Hillerød
As impressive as Frederiksborg may have been on the inside, this wasn’t the time for me to explore it. Unfortunately my financial issues turned me into the ultimate penny-pincher. For the time I would only enjoy such places from the outside where they were free of charge. Besides, the castle grounds and outside decorations were probably just as impressive as anything on the inside.
The victory pose returns!
Indeed, the gardens which are open to the public are a must visit to anyone around Hillerød. Some of the best spots include the cascading fountain – a series of terraced pools and waterfalls, the emblematic rose garden and the scenic Lake Slotsø with its family of white swans. Side-note: for some areas like the rose garden, it’s best to visit during the summer when all the flowers are in bloom.
Frederiksborg Castle gardens
My little one day trip to Hillerød was a much needed respite from my daily thoughts regarding increasingly troubling financial times.
The financial front
There was still no improvement on the money front. I believe it was around April when I had to pay the final installment of my rent and I was pretty much out of funds by that point. Despite my newfound ambition and zeal coming back from Gran Canaria, I was still unable to find a job. As much as I didn’t want to, I had to resort to the only person in my family that could help me stay afloat during the time… my geologist cousin living in Canada, Lucian.
Growing up, I had always looked up to my cousin and his successes. Heck, I even chose to follow the same career path as him. I knew that if I ever got into a really tight financial spot, all I had to do was ask and he’d help me out. Still… I really hated asking for help. Call it stubbornness, call it pride, call it whatever you want. This whole thing I was doing by moving to a completely new country and forging my path, I wanted to do it completely on my own. In my view, any outside assistance would just invalidate my one-man mission. However, by the spring of 2016, I was out of options.
As much as I loved my trusty, rusty ‘Shame”, I looked forward to the day I could afford to buy a new bike
I strictly asked my cousin for just the amount I needed to cover my final rent. I was going to take care of the rest myself, I told him. Of course he helped me out immediately.
It would take quite a long time for me to grow out of this prideful mindset. Well… to be honest, I can’t really say if I ever truly have. But at least these days I’ve come to accept that it’s ok to ask for help from others every now and again.
